Home/Tag: letting go

We Do Not See Things As They Are.

We do not see things as they are, we see things as we are. Need a pick me up to brighten your day? Click through to see the series Quick Inspiration on the Blog. The series includes some of my favorite quotes!

Perspective really is everything, isn’t it?  There have been countless times that I have misinterpreted a situation because I was viewing it from a different angle, and not how it was meant.

We all see things from our own lens, and it’s not always accurate–I know that knowing the difference is part of the growth process.  So I try to remember to take my ego out of the situation, that not everything is about me.  That helps me refocus on what’s really happening, not what I imagine the situation to be.

I’m going to try to hold this thought gently next time I feel like I’m not seeing things clearly.  Easier said than done, I know!  But it’s about progress not perfection, friends.

Love, Steph

 

 

 

P.S.  See more in the Quick Inspiration series here.

We Do Not See Things As They Are.2018-03-29T20:23:07-04:00

What if you knew?

What if you knew

I have a postcard sitting on my art desk in my studio that says in dark letters:

“What if you knew?”

I printed it in fancy script to keep it out in plain view for the moments I need a boost.  I want to be reminded on a daily basis that life is one big mystery and I’m not always going to know the outcome.

Even though it’s all a big mystery, things tend to work out, don’t they?  And even when it feels like things aren’t going to work out, I can eventually look back and recognize that yes, actually they did.

So it’s a good reminder–that most times we just won’t know what’s going to happen.

BUT what if we knew it would be ok?  That even though we don’t know the final outcome, we can enjoy the ride?

How would you act today if you just knew the universe was going to take care of you and you didn’t need to worry?

It’s a powerful thought that can calm even the scariest of moments.  Because deep in my heart I know that it’s all going to be ok, and I hope you do, too.

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What if you knew?2018-03-29T20:23:10-04:00

Getting To Know You + Me: Can You Be Spontaneous?

Getting To Know You + Me

This series is about getting to know you + me.  It’s a reflection of sorts to help you get to know yourself better (and I’m going to share, too!)  When we know ourselves better, it’s easier for others to know us, too, and that creates stronger bonds + connections.  As a result, we feel happier.

Here’s how it works:  I’ll be posting a question here on the blog and you can share your answer in the comments below or on Facebook, Instagram or Google+ using the hashtag #gettingtoknowyouandme .  The cool part is that you can use the hashtag to find others on the same journey.  Who knows?  You may make a new friend.

 

Getting To Know You + Me

It seems like being spontaneous is such a whimsical, sexy trait.  And I feel like part of me is capable of being spontaneous at times.  But for reals?  I’m a planner.

I LOVE to plan–I love to think a given situation out, work on each detail so I can thwart any complications before they come up.  I find that when I do this, I am more relaxed and can enjoy each moment more.  I don’t have to worry about a lot of snafus (other than the inevitable ones you can’t control no matter what.)

I’ve realized spontaneity works best for me when I don’t have time to think about it.  I guess that’s what spontaneity is #duh, but if it’s sprung on me, I can go along like a champ.  It’s fun to let go of control and ride the wave of a new plan when my gut says go.  Because it’s all about trusting my gut–I can be spontaneous when it feels right but if the feels right part isn’t there, I can’t jump on that train.

What about you?  Are you a hard core planner too, or can you often throw caution to the wind?

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Getting To Know You + Me: Can You Be Spontaneous?2018-03-29T20:23:10-04:00

Be Kind To Unkind People.

I was recently in one of my favorite health food stores at lunch time, looking for something quick to take on the go.  They have an awesome organic salad bar and fresh soups that are so yummy, I often dream about them (my favorite is vegetable dumpling!)  So while I was walking around checking out the offerings of the day, I noticed a lady that was getting the soup I was interested in.  I asked her with a smile, “Is that hot?” because sometimes when they bring out a new pot, it’s lukewarm and you need to heat it up a little.

I was being friendly–just making conversation, trying to make up my mind about what I was going to get.  Her response was: “How should I know, I can’t feel anything through the cardboard!”  I was a little taken back by her response, but I continued with a laugh “Oh, I’m sorry to bother you, I was just curious.  You actually can feel the heat through the cardboard” and extended my hand to touch it quickly (my first mistake).  She immediately recoiled in horror and started raising her voice at me: “I don’t work here!  Why don’t you ask someone that works here!”

Be kind to unkind peopleIn shock, I quickly tried to get away from her.  Clearly this was someone that didn’t want to be talked to and I totally get that.  I changed my location to the other side of the salad bar to end the whole interaction.  But apparently my new friend wasn’t done with me.

She proceeded to yell at the person behind the juice bar, “Hey this lady keeps bugging me about the soup, but I told her I don’t work here.  You work here–is it hot?  Please tell her so she stops bugging me.”  I couldn’t resist a rebuttal from across the salad bar (my second mistake) “I’m a grown adult and can ask for help if I need it, thank you.  You’re being really rude, please leave me alone.”

I wanted to be kind, but I was feeling so bullied; and I’m embarrassed to say I was shaking.  What did I do other than start a friendly conversation?  I felt like she attacked me for asking a simple question.  I realize this may not seem like a heavily involved exchange, but at the time, her nastiness made the hair on my neck stand up.  How was making me feel stupid helping her?

And then I remembered something I read in The Four Agreements: it’s not about me.  I was in the wrong place at the wrong time and the receiver of something that had nothing to do with me.  She was working something out and I was in the line of fire.

It wasn’t personal.

As soon as I was reminded of this, I calmed down a bit.

The employee went over to the soup and felt the pot–he declared that it was ‘adequately hot’.  The crazy lady started chatting to him about how she didn’t understand why I didn’t just ask him to begin with and reiterated again, that she didn’t work there.  Ok, lady.  We got it.

I took my time getting to the register to avoid another exchange with her and overheard her lecturing someone on line about a product that was recalled.  She wanted to know how it could still be in the store!   It was then that I realized that she probably just really needed a hug.   I flipped my thinking just then and wished her well in my heart.  She clearly wasn’t a happy person.

We all have bad days, I know.  This experience was a good reminder that just because people react towards me in a certain way doesn’t mean I have to engage.  There’s always a choice to be made–as long as I stay true to myself and remember not to take things personally, I can’t go wrong.

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Be Kind To Unkind People.2018-03-29T20:23:11-04:00

It Takes Time To Become Yourself

Time to become yourself

I painted this background last night in class. As I was layering the paints and letting my thoughts wander, this thought came to my mind: It takes time to become yourself.

We’re all in such a rush to get to our next destination, accomplishment or milestone that we forget the journey is where the magic happens.  It takes time to evolve and figure out who we are, what we want, how we feel.  There’s no hard and fast rule on how to live life; let’s slow down and take our time.  And luckily, we can change things up as we go.

Enjoy the dance, the ebb and flow, the challenges that come up; afterall, what is the alternative?  We miss out on the best moments while wishing for something else.  Be patient friends, things are happening the way they should and we are becoming ourselves bit by bit.

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It Takes Time To Become Yourself2018-03-29T20:23:11-04:00

A New Year Doesn’t Have To Mean A New You.

Are you tired of resolutions? Me too. Don't reinvent a new you this year--learn to love yourself + others deeper for real fulfillment.

Last year, I took a week to unwind and relax during the holidays.  It was an amazing time to recharge and it reminded  me how much I have to be thankful for.  I had a lot of time to reflect on my past year: I got engaged, moved to a new home and started my art business.  It was exciting, to say the least.

During my down time, I loved to see how others reflect on their past and how they’re viewing their future, too.  As I read a lot of blogs and posts on the web, I saw the usual common theme: how to be better for next year.  There’s always the thought about the new year that we need to constantly improve + keep expanding ourselves in order to be good enough.  Create the new you. But for some reason this year, that thought hit me differently.

I don’t know if it’s because I’m really trying to cultivate more compassion for myself and others, or if it was simply a growth moment, but I felt a little sad about making changes for the new year.  I realized I don’t want to change myself so much this coming year; I kind of like who I am right now.  Because it’s all about being comfortable + trusting our choices, right?  And loving who we are in any given moment.

I’m learning to ride the waves of my life + accepting that there are always going to be challenges.   And I’m enjoying learning more about who I am becoming, without beating myself up about it along the way, especially when things don’t go to plan.

So this year I’m going to work on focusing more on the wonderful qualities of who I am, and how they help me get to where I want to go.  I’m going to love myself deeper.  I’m going to zone in on what is working, because I know that what I focus on, will grow.  And that change to be better everyone talks about?  It will happen naturally.

Because I don’t want to live that shame-based existence that come with failed new year’s resolutions.  I want to let go of that ever-looming pressure to always be more, do more + try harder; it ruins a lot of fun along the way. Things don’t always have to change to be good, I can just appreciate how my life is right now.  And  if I don’t ‘get it all done’, I’m not a failure.

Do you want to join me on this self-kindness march?  Tell me what action you’re going to take to be more accepting of yourself here. Can you extend this compassion + kindness to others as well?  That means letting people off the hook and accepting them for how they are.  Because we’re all ok as is, even when we don’t believe it ourselves.

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A New Year Doesn’t Have To Mean A New You.2018-03-29T20:23:13-04:00
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